Making Resolutions Stick… Sunday Musings
It’s halfway through February. How are your New Year’s Resolutions doing?
So many of us start this resolution thing with great energy. When we’re younger and invincible, it seems a given we will get where we want to go, eventually. When we’re older and beat up a little by time and circumstances, it usually takes a whack over the head with a shovel to get us into resolution mode.
Heart attacks (yours or a friend’s) will generate healthy activity, for awhile. Seeing an obituary of someone your age will too. A candid photo showing your worst side; finding yourself out of breath when someone older than you is taking the stairs two at a time. These create discontent.
And that is one of the keys to making resolutions stick. Discontent. People in my industry are fond of telling people they should always focus on the positive. That optimism is the way to wealth, health, and happiness. I disagree.
Often the thing that drives us forward and forces a change in behavior and action is simply this: we can no longer stand to have things the way they are.
“ENOUGH!” We shout. “I’m DONE.” “I can’t live this way anymore.” Those are all powerful words. If you think “It sure would be nice to have better abs.” You probably ain’t going to last long at the gym. If you say, “I can’t stand this profile another day! I want my body back!” You’ll start doing things that make it happen.
How does this impact your resolutions? If you don’t have resolve about your resolutions, do yourself (and everyone who loves you) a favor and knock it off.
Stop putting things on your list you’re not passionate about. If you aren’t enthusiastic about getting where your resolutions say you want to go, you aren’t discontented enough to make it happen. Stop kidding yourself. You’re making us suffer just watching you and your half-baked effort.
Instead, do this: Look long and hard at all the things you say you want. Pick one. Take out a blank sheet of paper. Write all the great things you think will happen if you make this one resolution happen. How will you feel? How will you be better for it? What are all the benefits?
A wise person once told me that there are only two motivators in the world: Benefits and Consequences. Unfortunately, most of us focus on the latter when trying to motivate ourselves or others. “If you don’t do this, terrible things will happen!!!” That just doesn’t work.
Instead, try “If I/you do this, these wonderful things will happen. I/you will feel good because… I/you will have these benefits … “
Now, make a short list of things you would like to see happen. After each item, make a bullet-point list of the benefits of having that resolution come true. Post it on your refrigerator. Read the benefits every day.
Next to the resolutions write a note to yourself that says this: “When I am healthier, the people I care about benefit and are healthier, too.”
Look, the world has enough sick and crazy folks in it. We don’t need any more. The world needs healthy people. We’ve all got things about us that need work. It’s OK. So work on those things. Celebrate the good things about you. And get healthy!
Take care of yourself and have a great week,
Beth
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Beth Terry, CSP is a Professional Speaker and author of two books. She focuses on Management, Change, Stress, Customer Service, and Work Life Balance.
© 2008 Beth Terry Seminars, Inc. All international rights reserved.
Couldn’t have said it more succinctly myself. Unfortunately, some folks need to bonk themselves on the head over and over before they get it. “Doc, it hurts when I hit myself with this hammer.” “Then stop hitting yourself with that hammer.” ;-D
Cheers,
Beth
Pain makes change.