Grace trumps the “Law of Attraction”… Sunday Musings
I am continually amazed (and relieved) when I don’t get the things I thought I wanted. I don’t have a lot of issues about being clear and/or focused. When I decide I want something, I can put my head down and go for it with all my energy. That doesn’t mean I always get it.
Dad used to tell me, “God always answers prayer, and sometimes the answer is ‘NO!’”
If you don’t believe me, go to your high school reunion!
I had a knee-crumbling crush on a boy in my Freshman class. When he walked by I couldn’t breathe. I wasn’t the only one who held that opinion. He was a hunk. Three Letters on his leather jacket. Blue Blue eyes. Sigh.
He called one night during family dinner. My pastor dad frowned on such intrusions, since the only phone in the house hung on the wall between the kitchen and the dining room.
Dad handed me the phone anyway. When my heart throb said his name, I slid to the floor while trying gamely to sound grown up and unimpressed. I can’t remember why he called, but I know that call set me on a full-tilt-boogie attempt to win his love.
I had goals. I had a plan of action. I visualized us walking down the aisle. Wrote his name all over my notebooks; wrote my name with his last name; started naming the kids. I was a poster child for the the law of attraction …
… except that, mercifully, it didn’t work.
At my 20th high school reunion I scanned the room for him. Nonchalantly asked where he was. Was he coming? I wanted to see how he had turned out – what babe he had married, how many kids, what was he driving? Classmates who never left my hometown just stared blankly at me. No response.
When you leave a place all time stops. Everyone is the same age and stuck at the same level of maturity or immaturity in your mind. These classmates knew something I didn’t. And they weren’t talkin’.
The next day several of us hit the movies. The line to the tiny theater wound around the block. As we neared the ticket booth I saw a man on a blanket near the curb. Yellow teeth; curved orange nails jutting from blackened fingers. The town homeless man. No one saw him, he was always there. A fixture in this tiny town of 5,000.
Our eyes locked and he called out, “Are you one of the Terry kids?” I froze and slowly nodded. He yelled that he’d always loved my mom’s Sunday School classes. He didn’t seem to want anything from me, just to connect – to be a part of the energy of the town. He settled back, seemingly happy enough watching the moviegoers.
Two beats passed and I realized THIS was my heart throb! My brain texted me, “OMG Cn U Beleev?” This man, dream boat of junior high, had not weathered the 60′s very well. My heart sank, and I said a silent prayer for him…and a prayer of thanks that I had not gotten wound up in his troubles.
Yes, I know, someone will say he may have turned out differently had we fallen in love. But “what if” is a train we never get to ride.
I thought of this years later when I heard comedian Rita Rudner give this dating advice, “When you fall in love with a man, ask yourself, ‘Is this a man I want my kids to visit every other weekend?’ “
We’ve all had near misses – a car pulls into your lane and causes you to slow down. Around the bend is a policeman with a laser. Saved from a ticket! An email you shouldn’t have sent has an error in the address and doesn’t go out after all. Saved from your impulses!
Grace. For the times when you really don’t know what’s best for you!
Beth,
Living in gratitude and grace
More reading on the Law of Attraction
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Beth Terry, CSP
Certified Speaking Professional and Author
Website
© 2007 Beth Terry Seminars, Inc.
Marlo and Patsy – isn’t it amazing how much we think about what we want and forget to be thankful for what we already have? Thanks for checking in.
And Hi Joy! Thanks for writing,too. Glad you found me. I remember you. If you’re interested in being a speaker, go to NSASpeaker.org and check out the National Speakers Association. There are a lot of wonderful people in your area in the Association.
Beth
Beth – I really enjoyed hearing you speak at our recent conference (Pittsburgh, PA 9/10/07). I shook your hand and said you are doing what I hope to do in the future only more on an inspirational level. You seem to speak on several topics and I’m glad I signed up for your articles via email as I appreciate what you put into them. God Bless!
Joy
Beth,
Oh, so true. My prayer used to be, “O, God if only I could have this man or that thing”. Now it is one of thanks for NOT giving me what I thought I wanted at the time. I’m ever so glad he didn’t as the Gift he did give me was ever so precious and dear.
Another great newsletter.
A man that broke my heart and broke up with me was living alone when his home was put underwater by Hurricane Katrina. Had he not rejected me, I would have been there with him. Thanks, God for not giving me what I wanted!
“Wishes from our Addictions” – what a great line. I love it. Thanks for writing.
Beth
Man does that apply to me! Often we make wishes from our addictions and thank God they usually do not come true. I love that Rita Rudner quote, too!