No, we can’t read your mind (Lucky for you!) So Talk already!
The books are piling up on every available surface. I have at least four going at any given time. Management tomes and tombstones. Books about how to do it right and who really, really screwed it up.
A confluence of events has led me to think that most failures in personal and corporate life boil down to one word: Communication.
In every book on the best, bosses who communicated truthfully always won, even if the truth was not all that great. The, shall we call them ‘prevaricators,’ may have lasted a little longer, but the crash was more devilish and long lasting.
Who knows why humans don’t talk. Some don’t because they’re shy, or don’t know what to say. Some fear they’ll be found out… not as smart as they’ve tried to appear. Some tell partial truths to con people, to avoid pain, to avoid being caught, or feather their own nests. Some just don’t care.
There’s one thing we do know: if you don’t tell people what’s going on, you’ve left them to their own devices and imagination… and what they come up with will NEVER be good for you.
So Talk Already!
This was on my mind because a friend told me the love of his life is leaving, and he can’t figure out what happened. She won’t talk. He should just KNOW.
Both genders are guilty of that. We get stuck on the merry-go-round in our heads and forget the ‘other’ has no idea how we got from this horse to that one. How did we get from sadness or suspicion to all out insanity? From fear to rage? If we connect all the dots in our heads and don’t allow involved parties to give their perceptions, we cheat ourselves and our relationships.
So here I am thinking about this while researching for a speech on Planning and Organizing, and lo and behold! There’s a report called “Silence Fails.”
I have only scanned the report so far. But these are people I want to meet! They’ve done the research and come up with data that supports my assertions… in their words, “The Good News: Speaking Up Makes a Difference.” We knew that… now we have data.
Speaking Up makes a difference in our personal and corporate lives. If you don’t A-S-K you don’t G-E-T. And if you are walking around hoping people will just “know” what you are thinking, you are setting yourself up for failure.
Beth, who practices this one a LOT
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Beth Terry, CSP
Professional Speaker and Author
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© 2007 Beth terry Seminars, Inc.
